Why is it that when your friends go through a breakup, ritual behavior states that you are to take them out, get them drunk and put them in situations that only make them wish they weren’t single?
You may start the evening off on the right foot with something like a nice civilized dinner at a trendy restaurant. But then you end up at places like bars full of girls that are way too young and “other places” filled with people that are way too odd and creepy and furniture that could really use some plastic covers.
You would think that we would want to fill an evening or day with affirming experiences that support “going it alone” for a while. But even in our society where we have started delaying marriage and promoting independence of thought, we still go back to our primal place of craving companionship or proving that we’ve still “go it”. And I suppose the lowest-common-denominator situations can boost our self esteem and show us we are capable of getting back on that horse.
Maybe it’s a good idea to just put the horse up for a minute and read a book, develop a talent or focus on our careers? But alas, it comes back down to the human factor. We are all social creatures and when all is said and done all we want is someone to share our experience with us. And I suppose when you have ended a relationship you spend some time in a darker place in your brain and maybe that’s what motivates us to spend time in the darker corners of our social realms.
But to my friends who might be going through it, know there is a light at the end of the tunnel….and definitely soak those clothes in disinfectant….
- Surviving the Breakup (imperfectmusings.wordpress.com)
- What separates the “never-recover-from-this-breakup/shell of my former self” people from the ones who bounce back and love again? (ask.metafilter.com)